"If I Die, I'm Going To Die Historic On The Fury Road!"

 "Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence."

"Hello Speed Freaks, and welcome to our latest broadcast of Cars, Crashes and Carnage, where we reveal all the latest news concerning the vehicles racing across our barren, post-nuclear landscape. I'm your host with the most Rex Wonkers, and alongside veteran roustabout-turned-roughneck Lance Sourdough, I'll be taking a closer look at the four latest competitors to be announced for the Juice Cup."

"To open with we have the super-sleek Solar Eagle III, which largely consists of the identically-named die-cast vehicle produced by "Mattel" between 1998 to 2001. It's believed that the 20mm scale metal "Hot Wheels" model was purchased loose at a second-hand stall a couple of years ago, and having been kitted out with a couple of forward-facing machine-guns taken from the plastic Implements of Carnage One sprue by "North Star Military Figures", was subsequently super-glued on to a "Citadel" plastic 90 x 52mm oval base."

"Mattel WIPs" - This Duck N' Roll car has been converted using "North Star Military Figures" bitz 

"It was then that the lightweight, teardrop-shaped car was primed in "Vallejo" Heavy Red, shaded using some (disconcertingly gloopy) "Citadel" Agrax Earthshade and dry-brushed with (more) "Vallejo" Heavy Red, Rex. The driver's viewport was subsequently layered with "Citadel" Abaddon Black, whilst the 762 terrestrial-grade silicon solar cells and weapons were treated to a combination of "Vallejo" Gunmetal and "Citadel" Nuln Oil."

"In addition, you can't forget the rear-mounted mercenary riding 'shotgun'. The 20mm metal figure was selected from the NSPIoC13 - Corporate Team (Drivers & Passengers) set by "North Star Military Figures" and predominantly pigmented using "Vallejo" Heavy Blue and "Citadel" Nuln Oil. However, the machinegun-toting lookout also had his helmet picked out with a little "Vallejo" Heavy Red and "Citadel" Carroburg Crimson."

"That chap's going to have hold on very tight should the Solar Eagle III start accelerating up to its top speed of forty-three miles per hour, Lance. Of course, this solar car isn't the only headline grabber for this show, with the local Police Department's announcement of their 'Duck of Death' vehicle. Based upon the chassis of a "Hot Wheels" Duck N' Roll, this monstrosity will come armed with a formidable tesla cannon."

"North Star Military Figures" WIPs - Two more 20mm plastic motorcycles are on the painting table

"And let's not forget we also have another pair of 20mm plastic motorcycles found on the Implements of Carnage One sprue by "North Star Military Figures" dropping their dog-tags into the hat too, Rex. These boys are far more reliant upon their bikes' great speed to help them survive the tournament. Though I did spot one of them sporting a gatling gun at the front of their machine."

"Well that about brings our latest transmission to an end, Lancey Boy. So it's goodbye from the pair of us, and we look forward to speaking to all you wasteland survivors again in the next edition of Cars, Crashes and Carnage..."

Top Ten Miniatures Of 2024 - A "Rantings From Under The Wargames Table" Viewpoint

Well another year has come and gone, and as the clock creeps its way towards 2025 it’s time for me to give my assessment of Simon’s output for the year and pick my top ten miniatures from his consistently impressive output. So without further ado here my ten favourite miniatures of 2024.

No. 10 - Soviet Cosmonaut by "Black Site Studios" - November 21st

I’ve really enjoyed Simon’s posts about his combative astronauts, so much so that I had to go over and nose about “Black Site’s” website - though thankfully, I have resisted “pulling the trigger” so far! Yes the painting is deceptively simple on the face of it, with it being mostly just "Two Thin Coats" Sanguine Scarlet and "Citadel" Carroburg Crimson. But it’s this simplicity mixed with the painstakingly picked out details that made them really appeal to me. He has not gone mad trying to be overly clever with the painting, and as such the result works so well. I must also give a quick special mention to “Laika” the Cosmonaut dog, he’s just brilliant too!

No. 9 - Ultron by “CoolMiniOrNot” - July 15th

Despite never having played “Marvel United”, my love of all things “Marvel” does keep me avidly reading any posts I find with well painted figures for us “True believers” to enjoy. That’s exactly what we have here - a very well pigmented version of the Avengers bad guy Ultron. Once again though, at first glance it appears to be a simple paint job. But a closer inspection reveals several layers skilfully applied to give that sumptuous silver finish and red highlights. Indeed, this attention to detail is even carried over onto the base work!

No. 8 - Batmobile by “Mattel” - April 26th

Simon has been running a bit of a narrative commentary over the last couple of years linked to the “Gaslands” set of car combat rules, and has produced some awesome (and unusual) vehicles to take part in his games. However, this somewhat caricaturistic version of the 1989 Batmobile is my absolute favourite. The car itself fits the over the top theme of the game so well, and Simon’s additions are well thought out. Added to the simple black paintwork with its subtle red highlights - which hark back to the “Adam West” incarnation, and this is just perfection in my books.

No. 7 - Monica Rambeau by “Wizkids” - May 27th

Well there always seems to be at least one of the now legendary Heroclix figures by "Wizkids" in my yearly round up of Simon best, and this year you will be happy to learn is no different. Though I have to admit to being somewhat indifferent to Miss Rambeau’s exploits as “Captain Marvel” back in the eighties, I can very much appreciate a well painted figure, and this despite Simon’s own disappointment in his results is very much what I can see here. I have found overzealous paint application on the original figure to be a bit of a bugbear on many a “clix”. But the way he has worked around this problem to get the quality results he has is a testament to his and any painters skill.

No. 6 - Marshal Ney by “Warlord Games” - September 9th

I have long had an interest in the wars of Napoleon - mainly through historical fiction more than the gaming side of things - so Simon’s Napoleonic efforts are always a joy to behold. There is a lot of love that goes into each paintjob, and it shows through in the end results. This representation of the “First Prince de la Moskowa” is no different. The colours are as always spot on, and the attention to detail is top notch too. As for the painting? Well after all the relevant colours were in place, Simon "treated it to a zealous amount of Citadel Agrax Earthshade, before dry-brushing with Vallejo Heavy Brown to hopefully tie the colours all together” and, spoiler alert, it did! Top work.

No. 5 - Supernatural Investigator by “North Star Military Figures” - September 23rd

I love it when a figure designed to go with one game can be swapped over to a different game entirely, and that’s what’s happened here as this chap, the “Monster hunter” from "The Silver Bayonet" will also be serving his time amongst Simon's Napoleonic ranks. As usual, the painting is sublime and I especially love the contrast of the "Vallejo" Heavy Red scarf next to the "Two Thin Coats" Cold Corpse Blue of his long coat.

No. 4 - Ruthless Lieutenant by “Crooked Dice Design Studio” - January 15th

Well it was pretty obvious from the moment miniatures started appearing on Simon’s blog from the iconic 1980 version of “Flash Gordon” that at least one of them was going to make my list for this year. Though they were all rather wonderful, there was just something about his painting of this (not) General Kala that put her slightly above the rest. Maybe it was the black (he does do black so very well), I don’t know, but I can almost hear her shouting “Dispatch War Rocket Ajax, to bring back his body!”.

No. 3 - Commander Kuro by “Crooked Dice Design Studio” - August 12th

I’m a bit of a “toy fanatic” ('Big Kid' in other terms), and like nothing better than sourcing or making 28mm representations of my favourite toys from childhood. So it’s nice to know I have a kindred spirit in Simon, - especially when he’s posting inspiring stuff like this small scale incarnation of the “Action Force” villain known as the Black Major. Now I’m not going to wax lyrical about how well he paints any figures dressed in black (I say it every year, because it’s true!). But suffice to say the painting is excellent, and I was especially impressed by the “five o’clock shadow” the figure is sporting.

No. 2 - Howard Quartz by “Warlord Games” - March 31st

Anyone who knows me knows I’m a sucker for the "ABC Warriors" and anything associated with them. So when this outstanding version of the boss of a trio of former/future members of the team appeared on Simon's blog, he certainly had me sitting up and paying attention. The lovely neat brushwork and attention to detail brought the erstwhile ten percent human leader of Ro-Busters very much to life.

No. 1 - Skeletal Spaceman by “Diehard Miniatures” - December 25th

So what has made it to the top of the tree this year? Well Simon left it pretty late to do his finest work by not posting this till Christmas Day. This outstanding undead astronaut is a really nice figure, but it’s the pure 'tour de force' in painting the skeleton that really lifts it to new heights. The actual bone work is expertly tinted and is a perfect contrast to the “grubby” white of his spacesuit. This isn't easy to do, and a closer look reveals subtle aquamarine tones that also add interest without distracting from the piece as a whole. Just really impressive work I love this.

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So that’s it another year of wonderful miniatures condensed into a few lines by yours truly… Well obviously not! There are so many other outstanding posts well worth a re-read (or first read if you missed them), that my advice is grab a brew and a mince pie so you can scroll back to January, and revel in Simon's excellent painting and prose!

Here’s wishing you all a very happy new year. Whether you be gaming or painting here’s hoping you get the results you hope for. I’ll now hand back the reins to Simon, and thank him for letting me loose upon his blog.

Cheers Roger.

N.B. You can visit Roger's excellent wargaming blog and see his excellent output here:

"Rantings From Under The Wargames Table"

"To The Batmobile!"

"This could be the break we've been looking for!"

"Greetings Speed Freaks, and welcome to our latest broadcast of Cars, Crashes and Carnage, which will be providing more insights into some of the vehicles racing across our fuel-scarce, post-apocalyptic landscape. I'm Rex Wonkers, and alongside veteran crude oil seeker Lance Sourdough, I'll be taking a closer look at two more recently announced competitors in the Juice Cup."

"First up is the formidable-looking Dark Knight, which has predominantly been fashioned using the Batman Batmobile 1989 Movie Die-cast Vehicle by "Mattel". The metal "Hot Wheels" model was picked up loose for just a pound at a Vintage Toy & Train Collectors Fair outside the Ashington Community Centre, West Sussex, and was subsequently super-glued to a "Citadel" plastic 90x52mm oval base."

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - The Batmobile was given various plastic armaments

"It was definitely a bargain find, Rex, and once 'tooled up' using some accessories taken from the plastic Implements of Carnage One sprue by "North Star Military Figures", was soon undercoated using a mixture of "Vallejo" Surface Primer Black and "Warlord Games" Pitch Black. It was then give a hearty dry-brush with a little "Vallejo" Heavy Charcoal, before being doused in "Citadel" Nuln Oil. The car's wheel trims, side exhausts, bulldozer blade and passenger-side mounted Gatling gun were all later hit with some "Vallejo" Gunmetal and "Citadel" Nuln Oil.

With the main paint scheme applied, the ride's flamer had its fuel-bottle 'picked out' with a smidgeon of "Two Thin Coats" Skulker Yellow, and its rear-firing flares were given a lick of "Vallejo" Heavy Red and "Citadel" Carroburg Crimson. Finally, to weather everything up, the entire ensemble was sporadically given a coat of "Mig Productions" Extreme Rust Wash and dry-brushed in whatever the area's base colour was."

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - Solar Eagle III has been primed, base-layered and shaded

"Thanks, Lancey Boy. Alongside this 'Dark Knight' there's also word of an astonishing battery-powered potential participant who'll be using the chassis of a Solar Eagle III (in red livery). This incredibly low-profiled automobile largely consists of a lengthy solar panel. However, its owners have fitted a couple of forward-facing machineguns close to its cockpit."

"And let's not forget that the vehicle will also carry a rather exposed gunman at the rear, Rex. This guy is going to be precariously positioned just south of the car's Kevlar cog belt-driven rear wheel. So let's hope he can hold on tight to something should the 'Solar Rider' ever need to make a quick turn."

"Too right, Lance. And with that we've come to the end of yet another transmission. So, it's goodbye from the pair of us, and we'll hopefully speak to all you irradiated couch potatoes again in the next instalment of our humble sports programme..."

"What's A Little Fallout?"

"Lost everything. Looking for a deal."

"Hello everybody, and welcome to this opening transmission of Cars, Crashes and Carnage, I'm your host, Rex Wonkers, and together with renowned petroleum prospector Lance Sourdough, we'll be bringing you all the exciting news leading up to our post-apocalyptic community's very first Juice Cup."

"To start us off we'll be taking a look at one of the many planned maniacal motorcyclists aiming to make a name for themselves in the suicidal sport. This foolish fella was assembled using a couple of the 20mm plastic pieces found on the Implements of Carnage One sprue sold by "North Star Military Figures" as Code NSPIoC05 in their Gaslands Refuelled range and will doubtless simply ride around the arena acting as a moving obstacle to be avoided by the other competitors."

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - These two vehicles have been weathered with "Mig Productions" Extreme Rust Wash

"That's right, Rex. This poor fool wasn't equipped with any actual weaponry, and was simply primed with "Citadel" Abaddon Black. He was then heavily dry-brushed with "Vallejo" Brown and later Gunmetal, before being soaked in "Citadel" Agrax Earthshade." 

"Once all this basic weathering was finished, the rider's leather suit, visor and the bike's wheels were tidied up with some extra "Citadel" Abaddon Black. Whilst his armoured limb plates and helmet were treated to a combination of "Vallejo" Gunmetal and "Citadel" Nuln Oil. In addition, the old lady's seat was layered with "Vallejo" Heavy Brown and the racer's belt Heavy Sienna. Both of these areas were subsequently shaded in "Citadel" Agrax Earthshade."

"Thank you, Lancey Boy. I understand some additional touches of "Mig Productions" Extreme Rust Wash were also used on the motorcycle and then blended in with a delicate dry-brush of "Vallejo" Gunmetal. Now, what can you tell the audience about some of the other planned participants of the Juice Cup..?"

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - A Synkro and Duck N´ Roll with added weapon turrets and gunmen

“Well Rex, the biggest name is obviously our illustrious sponsor Bob's Burgers, who'll be entering his very own food truck into the inaugural event. His "Hot Wheel" by "Mattel" has been armed with a pair of deadly machine guns, and will be having its famous burger and fries re-painted to celebrate the occasion. Furthermore, we have at least one Land Rover Defender 90 competing for the prize in the shape of former British military-man Squaddie One."

"Plus, hot off the press I believe they'll be at least one custom build based on a Synkro chassis, and the local Constabulary have signed on with a... giant weaponized duck..!?! Doubtless we'll be able to update viewers with more on these extraordinary additions to the Juice Cup's roster in our next edition of Cars, Crashes and Carnage. But for now its time to go..."

“There Remained, However, An Element Of The Old Guard…”

“…Mostly former Luna Wolves, whose loyalties could not be relied upon.”

These three 28mm plastic Space Marines are by "Games Workshop" and come from the now sadly OOP (Out Of Production) Burning Of Prospero boxed game. The multi-piece miniatures have been assembled wearing MK III armour, and are some of the ten figures I need to field my first Sons of Horus Tactical Squad for the Horus Heresy.

The trio of figures were initially undercoated with "Citadel" Sons Of Horus Green, before being heavily washed with Nuln Oil, and dry-brushed with (more) Sons Of Horus Green. I then applied some "Citadel" Abaddon Black to all their shoulder-pads, as well parts of their backpacks and Bolters.

“On Isstvan III the Warmaster set a trap for these warriors.”

All of the models’ power tubes and firearms were subsequently treated to a combination of "Vallejo" Gunmetal and "Citadel" Nuln Oil. Whilst I 'picked out' all the ridges on their shoulder-pads and helmets with a layer of "Vallejo" Gold. These areas were later given a splash of "Citadel" Agrax Earthshade and highlighted with some additional smidgeons of "Vallejo" Gold on the sharpest edges and rivets.

As a final touch I applied some "Scalecolor" Speed Metal to the Space Marines’ eye slits, and then a single layer of the "Citadel" Contrast colour Flesh Tearers Red. I also fixed one of the many decals found on the "Games Workshop" Sons of Horus Legion transfer sheet onto their right shoulder-pads. I did consider placing a second, different decal onto the other ones, but then thought it was something I might do at a later date - as I rather liked the bare black colour scheme.

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - This Land Rover Defender 90 has been primed, shaded and dry-brushed

With a nice portion of my Sons of Horus infantry squad now completed, I have spent some time working on a second 1:64 scale "Hot Wheels" vehicle for my post-apocalypse ‘Cars Wars’ project. This Land Rover Defender 90 was bright red in colour, but it was suggested to me that it might look better in British Army Green, and thus Squaddie One was born.

The vehicle was originally just going to have a pair of machine-guns on its bonnet (as opposed to a spare wheel). However, I thought this made it look a little boring, so eventually decided to super-glue one of the “roughly 20mm scale” metal Bootleggers produced by “North Star Military Figures” onto its back roof. The figure’s backside neatly fitted between two of the truck’s ridges, so I only needed to scrape a little of its paint away to ensure a metal upon metal contact…

"Look At This Mess."

"No point in taking out the rest. Silver's penetrated his organs. Regeneration's impossible at this point."

This 28mm scale "white metal" miniature of a Slick Gang member is produced by "Crooked Dice Game Design Studio", and was bought as part of my Three Set pledge for their recent "Corporate Wars" Kickstarter. One of seven bald, trench-coat wearing killers, the model was sculpted by the late Jim Bowen and previously sold by the now sadly defunct "East Ridings Miniatures".

The figure comes stood upon a fairly hefty integral stand, so before I could apply two coats of “Vallejo” German Grey to him, this area was snipped away just enough to super-glue the near future mobster onto a 25mm circular plastic base. He was then shaded with "Citadel" Nuln Oil, and ferociously dry-brushed with (more) "Vallejo" German Grey.

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - The armed truck is slowly having its tyres, exhaust, weapons and burger picked out

The criminal's two pistols were given a lick of "Citadel" Ababbon Black, and had both barrels, as well as his shades, 'picked out' with a combination of "Vallejo" Gunmetal and "Citadel" Nuln Oil. Lastly, the Slick's jacket buttons were treated to some "Vallejo" Brass, a splash of "Citadel" Agrax Earthshade, and a highlight of (more) "Vallejo" Brass.

With the latest of my "Corporate Wars" miniatures completed, I have spent some additional time working on my opening contribution to Dave Stone's "Apocalypse Me" challenge. In the past I've restricted my "Mad Max" needs to Mark Copplestone's 28mm Future Wars range. But currently seem to what to do nothing else except fit 1:64 scale "Hot Wheels" vehicles with all manner of weapons and then 'distress the hell out of them' with some weathering.

"Games Workshop" WIPs - A Sons of Horus Space Marine with Legion Vexilla awaiting some shading

To begin with I had settled upon simply rusting up Fast Eddie's "Buns Of Steel" food truck after equipping it with a pair of machine-guns. However, since "the Force is strong with this one", I've also been busy adding some missiles and other automatic weapons to some other cars, as well as assembled a plastic motorcyclist using the plastic parts found on the Implements of Carnage One sprue sold by "North Star Military Figures".

Finally, I am putting some of the final touches onto the Legion Vexilla-carrying Sons of Horus Space Marine I need for my traitor legion's MK III power-armoured tactical squad. Pigmenting this particular 28mm plastic model by "Games Workshop" has taken quite a bit of careful patience to ensure that the delicately attacked piece of wargear doesn't inadvertently snap off whilst I'm applying a brush-tip to it...

(Lead) Mountain Musings - "Encounter Terrain" Zomtober 2022

"I will slaughter you in that pod right now."

This month's themed attempt to whittle away at my 'tower of temptations past' will actually focus upon my completing a number of 40mm resin models sculpted by Nikola Stankovic and 3D printed by "Encounter Terrain". I've actually been slowly working away at this growing range over the past few weeks, but thought entering a few horror-themed figures into the "Zomtober" challenge would give the project a bit of an adrenalin boost.

Now admittedly, "Doctor Who" isn't really the first science fiction genre which leaps to mind when people think about the living dead. However, I did think a handful of zed-like Cybermen might fit the bill at a push. In addition, I will be applying my brush to a few allies/foes which come from outside the BBC television programme, such as Ash Williams ("Evil Dead"), Frankenstein's Monster, Jason Voorhees ("Friday The Thirteenth"), the Wolfman, and Michael Myers ("Halloween").

"Hot Wheels" WIPs - The armed truck is slowly being heavily weathered with rust

Alongside these goals I'm also planning on contributing to Dave Stone's "Apocalypse Me" challenge over on his excellent "Wargames Terrain Workshop" blog. Recently, I have been attending a few local weekend Toy Fairs, and been marvelling at the incredible range of vehicles produced by "Mattel" for their "Hot Wheels" range. Now, whilst I do own the original version of "Gaslands" by "Osprey Wargames", I've never felt inclined to get into the 'Car Wars' world until now... thanks largely to spotting Fast Eddie's "Buns Of Steel" food truck.

Truth to be told, I still don't intend to play "Gaslands". However, I do already have some homemade space-fight rules I intend to adapt into a collaborative car game where a pair of drivers compete across several rounds for the infamous Juice Cup. Resultantly, I have bought the Implements of Carnage One plastic weapon/riders/vehicles kit from "North Star Military Figures", re-based/primed my impulse purchase, and armed it with couple of machine-guns so it can be fielded as Juice Cup sponsor Bob's Burgers.

September 2022 - "Crooked Dice Game Design Studio" captures the top spot

Progress wise, the last month has been my best September by far, and definitely helped get me back on track to improving upon last year's annual output. I had admittedly been hoping to finish a few more "Games Workshop" models from their "The Lord Of The Rings" range, but was very pleased to complete all the Killbots by "Crooked Dice Game Design Studio" which I own instead. Indeed, combined with the start of my "Corporate Wars" project, the Lincolnshire-based manufacturer's figures have dominated my interest over the past four weeks.

Looking ahead, I can't see this enthusiasm declining any time soon, especially as I'm finding the late Jim Bowen's futuristic sculpts a nice and straightforward subject to pigment whenever I get fed up 'picking out' the intricate details on my "Horus Heresy" Sons of Horus traitor space marines. Furthermore, I expect to see quite a few 40mm scale 3D printed miniatures hitting the tabletop as I finally approach owning enough painted models to play a few skirmish games - potentially using the rule-set "Space Station Zero" by "Snarling Badger Studios"...